The Healthy Cookie

Everyone has their addictions. For some it’s sugar, others it’s alcohol or cigarettes, there’s recreational drugs, sleeping, coffee, bacon and eggs on Sunday, trashy magazines, trash TV… the list is virtually endless. We all have something that we do, that we know we shouldn’t, but that we do anyway. I am not here to judge. I, of course, have my own.

There is however one addiction that is seemingly universal. One that we all seem to suffer from. One that may be more detrimental to our own personal health and the health of society as a whole. And that is an addiction to stress.

I would like to be very clear that we need stress. Stress itself is not a bad thing. It can be a great motivator, a driving force and can benefit us in many ways. The problem with stress, or rather the insanely crazy amount of stress that we are all under, is that it is too much and we are not coping. We are overwhelmed, burning out and getting sick.

When I refer to stress, it is not just the stress of our jobs, finances, or relationships. These are all huge stressors in our lives. But there is also emotional stress, physical stress, and ecological stress. And now, in modern urban centers there is the stress put on our bodies by the electromagnetic frequencies flying through the air, criss-crossing every which way from the abundance of cel phones, computers, tvs, radios and on and on and on. In a book written about the dangers of cell phone usage, it provides research explicitly detailing how, after being on a cellular or cordless phone for 30 seconds, every cell of our body goes into sympathetic mode, also known as ‘Fight or Flight”. That means that even when we are having a jolly ‘ole convo with our bestest friend- our cells are receiving stress signals.

So what happens to our bodies when we are chronically stressed? Our bodies build disease. It is something of a cascade response in the nervous system. One of the many things that happen when operating in the Sympathetic Nervous System is that the digestive system shuts down. Eating on the run? Such a bad idea. When the digestive system isn’t working, food isn’t being broken down, nutrients can’t get into the body, the body can’t get what it needs, the immune system becomes compromised, cycles stop running and we become sick, depressed, highly anxious, and irritable. Our adrenals become overworked- they are the glands that handle stress, and they secrete cortisol and adrenaline (epinephrine), the stress hormones, to try and help us manage the stress. But the adrenals can only work over time for so long before they burn out and we are left to our own devices to manage stress. That is when the maladaptive coping mechanisms come in- the drugs, the alcohol, the food cravings, the cigarettes among other self-destructive behaviors; all of which end up putting more stress on the body and the sufferer becomes trapped in a very precarious cycle. The habits of overworking, overeating, hyperactivity and substance dependency can keep our motors running for a long time. The crash, however, is inevitable.

The addiction to stress becomes all encompassing. It quickly will get to a stage where we no longer know how to come down or calm down without the addition of another stressor- like a drink or a cigarette or a constant twitch that involves checking the cel phone or Blackbery. Breaking the cycle comes with all sorts of withdrawal symptoms. Often we cope by reaching for something that will help us to feel something different at a low moment and gives us a sense of control over the situation. When we are so addicted to stress and then suddenly find ourselves in moments of stillness with nothing to do- we get fidgety, antsy, and anxious. One of our worst stress addictions is the addiction to repetitive thought patterns and there is no greater harm to our health than the stress we create in our own minds.

What we have to realize though is that stress will never be out of our lives. It is a part of life. What matters is how we chose to deal with it, how we see things, and how we handle them that will dictate how much stress we experience. The trick is to become more mindful and aware of what we are experiencing in the moment of stress. We have all had an experience where the slightest little thing can trigger a big fat over reaction, completely out of proportion to the actual event itself. This, of course, is more likely to happen when we are already feeling anxious and vulnerable. Jack wouldn’t jump out of the box so fast if he weren’t so wound up.

There is also a physiological truth that when we feel stressed, we stimulate the amygdala, the part of the brain known as the threat detector. This part of the brain also has a negative bias. That means that in times of stress- our brain provides us with the service of pointing out only the negatives of a situation. For example- if you were to give a presentation to 1,000 people and 999 were listening in awe at your profound wisdom and charisma on stage, you, as the stressed and anxious presenter, would only see the one person in the back row taking a nap. A wondrous little function of the brain, no?

As it is written in Full Catastrophe Living (FCL) “Automatic reactions, triggered out of unawareness, usually compound and exacerbate stress, making what have remained basically simple problems into worse ones… Each time we react, we stress our internal balance even more. A lifetime of unconscious reactivity is likely to increase our risk of eventual breakdown and illness”.

Our favourite maladaptive coping strategy is to pretend like everything is fine and dandy, that we have no problems at all. It is very hard to release stress when we won’t even admit to ourselves that it is there. And when we are challenged about the stress that we carry around, such accusation are likely met with strong denial, anger and possibly resentment. Often we cope with stress by filling our time with busyness. Running around non-stop doing things for ourselves and others until our lives are overflowing with obligations is a sure-fire way to avoid looking at the things in our lives that need some attention.

So what is the alternative? There are ways out of the cycle. It is not easy at first but it is possible. As it states in FCL “The healthy approach is to stop reacting to stress and to start responding to it. This is the path of mindfulness in daily life…We [will eventually] come to see that effective control can come out of inner calmness, acceptance, and openness”.

Before reaching for that addictive substance to help calm the nerves, try a natural, beneficial approach first. Giving the mind moments to rest makes space for new thoughts to come in. Some of my greatest ideas and moments of clarity have come in the ten minutes that follow my morning and evening meditation practice. The trick is to stay in the present moment, with awareness, and take each moment and event as it comes.

Taking five minutes out to take some deep belly breaths (in through the nose until the belly is fully expanded and slowly exhaling through the nose until the abdomen is flattened) will switch you over from the sympathetic (fight/flight) to parasympathetic (rest/digest) mode. Taking up a meditation practice can be as simple as spending five minutes a day sitting quietly focusing only on the breath coming in and out of the nose, adding a few minutes to the practice each week until you find yourself sitting for 20 minutes, 30 minutes or even an hour when time permits (Be warned that in meditations, stresses often come to the fore as they are released but sit with them, experience the negative feelings and then just let it go knowing that whatever experience you are having is exactly right). Take a walk outside. Spend time in nature. Eat in a calm, restful, relaxed environment. Stretch your body out once in a while through your work day.

Most of all- be easy on yourself and those around you. We are, after all, all in this together.

Related Healthy Cookie Links

• Go Ahead, Cry Over Spilled Milk
• Sit With Them And Be Calm
• Calm In The Every Day